Quotes

This page is for people to write down memorable quotes.

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General quotes

Pre-2004

"A flute is a deadly weapon."

"Does that shirt have a knob on it?" -Brian Menyuk

"Tim -sleeps with- Tony" -the whole band

"Ellery, stop banging Jen against the glass!"

"If it's worth doing, it's worth overdoing." -old band saying

"Does it look like I have the capacity to lay eggs!?" -Conan O'Brien

"Where's your cane, Ray?"

"Are we there yet, Daddy Ray?" -old (no pun intended) band saying

"It's not a tuba, it's a sousaphone!" -Dave Schroeder

"Looking at red will make you go blind." -Jason Shapiro

"Forwards, not backwards; upwards, not forwards; and always twirling, twirling, twirling." -The Simpsons

"Gangrenous Defenestration, get jiggy with it!" -The 3 Musketeers (Jason, Dave, and Jen)

"Stop throwing your brain around and put it back in your pants where it belongs!"

"Flying Fucking Piano Zowie" -Bill Ruhsam

"THERE IS ONLY ONE "E" in ENDOR YOU FOOLS!!! IT JUST DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE!" -Sebastian Corbisiero

"JAIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" -Jim Cronen [upon seeing a trumpet-player after making his trumpet debut sight-reading all the music at the Hartford Civic Center in front of 8,000 people]

"It's not how you finger, it's how you blow." -Joan Gitnick

"LOOK! I'VE GOT EXPLOSIVES! HA HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!" -Brian Menyuk

"Look over there, it's the Coast Guard Rescue Chopper!!!" -Joe Gillman, as a helicopter flew by while the RPI football team was kicking some major Coast Guard ass.

"Joan kicked Jason in the cowbell." -Dave Schroeder

"Tickle THIS Delwo!" -in reference to Dartmouth's goalie

"No, we need toilet paper... the round kind." -Kristian Mayville, on the Harvard/Brown trip

"WASSSUUUUPPPP!!!!" -Budweiser commercials

"Jeezus, dude! Get some pants!" -some guy to Justin Becker

"JOOOOLEEEE" -poor Julie :)

"If only I had some Andrea-snacks." -Kristian Mayville

"Snap into a Slim Jim! Oooooh yeeaah!" or, just "Snap into it!"

"Angle AJ, Angle!"

"Put your fingers in the holes!" -Nick, Jeff and Bob, simultaneously

"I can choke it." -Mikey

"I'm keeping this head!" -Mikey, again

"How many of us really need to pull it out?" -Mark Doherty

"This van needs 'Oh $h!t' handles." -Jeff Carroll

"You could mate her." -Jim Felicito

"The ice must have been slippery." -Joan Gitnick

"Does he have to eat the hair that came in his beer?" "No, it didn't come in my beer, it came from one of his balls."

"Without you, your life has no meaning." -some drunk Fiji brother at either UVM or Dartmouth, as heard by Dave Nangle and Eric Lynn

2004-2005

"I'll ground your round." - Andrew Bickford, in Providence

"Hey Walsh, I slept with your wife!" - Neil Havlak, to St. Lawrence coach Joe Marsh

"Where's your messiah now?" - Unknown, at an RPI/Sacred Heart Game

2005-2006

"Give me an E!" -Tim Tesluk
"E!" -Band
"Thanks." -Tim

2006-2007

(while at the Alumni Lasagna Party before Freakout 2007)
-cellphone ring-
"Tickets.com, this is Yuri" -Yuri Koester
-the room breaks out in laughter-

"Tim, my esophagus feels all Christmassy" -Mike Joseph, after many shots of Peppermint Schnapps

"I'm thinking of a number between one, and asshole." -Mike Joseph
"That number is douchebag, my friend" -Jim Scott [his roommate]

"You see this many people walk in with the same shirt on, and it's either a sports team, a fraternity, or...a cult."
-Steve Mulick at TGI Friday's, when 16 of us went for dinner after a game
"We're totally the third one!" -Chris Behrens

"That's no excuse, get it back in your pants!" - Andrew Bickford

"Warm up the sheep!" -Neil Havlak, after a Colgate band chant of "Warm up the bus!".

"What haven't I done to Rachel Ray?" - Andrew Bickford

"It's like Clarkson and The Final Countdown had an ugly baby." -Steve Mulick, commenting on an über version of The Clarkson Death March

"You don't need a gong for James Bond, it just helps." - Dave Siebecker

"...That's what she said..." - The Band

2007-2008

"I'm a finisher now!" - Tim Fill

"I'm 7 for 11 from on top of Gary's shoulders, and 2 for 3 with a Coors Light box on my head." - Tim Fill

"Hey Red! You're still skating in straight lines. TAKE MORE SHOTS!" - James Lauser

"Put it in Natalie Mode!" - Chris Behrens (Clarkson-SLU trip)

"We're at Clarkson already?" - Chris Behrens
"Yeah."
"So this is what hell looks like."- Chris Behrens

"It's the good kind of crazy, it's the crazy kind of crazy" - Mike Joseph (Clarkson-SLU trip)

"...Damnit Garr, you're not my girlfriend." - Dan Schwarting (Clarkson-SLU trip)

"How can you not like bacon? It's meat candy!" - Drew Hoyt

Angelina - "Guess what I have?"
Gary - "I don't know, but I don't have pants on"

"That was soooo close to my mind." - Drew Hoyt

"Wasn't Black Friday on a Sunday?" - Ken Rios

"Ken, shuffle the big, damn dick. I mean deck." - Kevin Kelly (Colgate-Cornell trip) playing cards.

"That's weird, it stayed erect while I was blowing it." - Ken Rios inflating thunder sticks at the Whiteout/Senior Night/Clarkson game.

"That was so bad, it was worse than Rocky Five!" - Jeff Jones to the CUP Band after they botched "Gonna Fly Now" and "Eye of the Tiger" in consecutive stoppages.

Manager quotes

"I'm not as dumb as I am." -Dave Schroeder

"We're one giant, inbred, dysfunctional family." -Jason Shapiro

"Tell Sebastian to stop poking me with his light saber." -Andrea Catenaro

"I'm a transsectional!" -Jen Bernfeld

"Shut up, you're just a figurehead." -Jen Bernfeld, to Sebastian

"You only need one of Hiscock." -Erica Baer, after Corey stated, "He's even better than Stay, Long, and Harder."

"I'm not useless! I can break rocks!" -Mark Matarazzo

"We're discussing the best way to finger." -Erica Baer

2006-2007

"I'm the master of the rim job." -Gary Russinko

"I am as content as a platypus eating carrots in spring, in June" -Chris Behrens

"We've got to maintain denausible pliability" -Gary Russinko

"There's so much head!" -Gary Russinko

"Wait, did you just say the dragon had 7 heads and 10 horns?" -Andrew Bickford
"Yeah." -Steve Mulick
"That's not an even number of horns per head." -Andrew Bickford
"It's the f***ing bible. What do you expect?" -Gary Russinko

"Trumpets! 1, 3!... 2. Shit." -Gary Russinko

"Yeah, you can feel all of that heat coming out of the laptop when it's on your lap." -Dan Schwarting
"Feel all those Joules... on your jewels..." -Gary Russinko

"Ti he he he he he hee!" -Gary Russinko, sissy laugh after bowling

2007-2008

"Tim, you should try this. It's yum." -Gary, re: O'Doul-Aid

"Shirley-Ann fanfiction!" -Natalie
"Shirley-Ann walked into the room, her eyes glowing...I can't do this!" -Gary

Conductor quotes

"Pull it out and keep it out." -Bill von Achen

"It's too cold for me to just whip it out." -Sebastian Corbisiero

"I may be a guy, but I'm not stupid." -Sebastian Corbisiero

"142, Give Me Some Lovin'! (NO!) That's ok; I have the Sports Illustrated Swim Suit Edition!" -Tim Vanderpoel

"Baby Jesus is watching us." -Tim Vanderpoel

"If Vickie is a verb, then how do you do Vickie?" -Victoria Myers

"Sounds like someone wants a beat down" -Victoria Myers "oh yeah!" -The Band

"I'm 'sucks', dammit!!" -Sarah Toner

2000-2001

"That's not a mirror." -Bill von Achen (while [drunkenly] looking at the picture window in living room at White Sled)

2006-2007

"Up at the break: 142 - Gimme' Some Lovin'" - Dan Schwarting
"NO!" - The Band
"438 - Are You Gonna Be My Girl?" - Dan
"NO!" - The Band

"So back on topic, bowling with midgets?" - Dan Schwarting

2007-2008

"Not to be overcritical, but when you play like that it sounds like ass." -Mike Franke to Chris Behrens and Max Katz about playing on the same drum simultaneously.

"Do we want to do The Stripper?" -Mike Franke at Freakout rehearsal calling the next song to play.